Can you feel it coming?
Something's waking up inside.
Hearts ablaze we're standing tall breaking chains of yesterday.
Dead America finds it's voice, in the darkness, we make choice.
Truth and healing lead
the way, hearts ablaze, we're here to stay.
Rise from ashes come what may, we're finding hope in disarray.
Today, we're speaking with Todd Smith.
He's a podcaster, a top podcaster, his podcast is Stress Management
for Highly Sensitive People.
Todd, could you please introduce yourself?
Let people know a little more about you, please.
Thanks, Ed.
It's great to be here.
And, uh, I do teach stress management for highly sensitive people.
And what that means is that, first of all, highly sensitive
people need a little more stress management, it tends to be that way.
Um, but the most important thing I teach is that high sensitivity is
not a flaw, it's not something wrong.
And this is especially tough for men, uh, because in our society, sensitivity
is, is not looked at as a, as a good thing, uh, can be put down or thought of
as, as feminine or something like that.
But it's a well-researched trait.
Uh, it was first looked at in the nineties, uh, or more deeply looked at
by a lady named Elaine Aron, and she's written books on high sensitivity.
It's short version is HSP, and it just means that you're more,
you process things more deeply.
And, uh, you, as a result, can end up with a little more overwhelm than other people.
You also are a little more emotional or more empathetic with our other
people and a little more sensitive to noise and lots of things going on.
So I specialize in working with these kinds of people, I'm a
highly sensitive person myself.
And, uh, it is a pleasure to work with people like this because we like depth,
we like to go in deep, we like to explore things.
And we have special needs that are a little more risk than other people
and need to be able to process things.
So I teach a method of self-inquiry that allows you to fully digest any
stressful experience and grow from it.
And I've been doing that for probably twenty years, and, uh, and love it.
I'm in British Columbia, Canada, I'm originally from the United States,
I've lived all over the place.
Married a Canadian, so that's where I ended up.
Um, but I'm a dual citizen.
Yeah.
That's wonderful, Todd.
The, the thing that I caught from your research was, a lady,
Byron Katie, now this is where you take your inspiration from.
And it's, it's kind of interesting what she laid out there about you have to go
deep inside of yourself and really open up to yourself and be true to yourself
to actually be okay with the world.
Is that correct?
Yeah, exactly.
The world doesn't cooperate with what we want, not very often anyway.
It, we can do things, we can get, we can accomplish things, we have a lot of
control in some ways, but there's a lot of things we don't have control over.
And one of those is how other people think and feel and react and all of that.
And so if you go into yourself and find out where, where you stand, what
your truth is in a situation, even if it's not what you were originally
thinking, you can experience the same situation in a much freer way.
And so this process is about inner freedom.
My website's called Inner Freedom, uh, True Inner Freedom.
And it's, it's about, um, finding your truth, not the truth of someone else.
And it's about questioning anything in your own mind that
is not feeling true to you.
Like, you know, we believe a lot of stories, we get caught up in a lot of
stories, but we end up just believing them without actually looking at it.
And what I mean by looking at it is looking inward and seeing,
does that really resonate with me?
Is that really feel right?
Is that true?
And then seeing if there's another way of looking at it.
So yes, a very powerful way of, of reexperiencing or reframing,
uh, stressful experiences.
So in essence, this is kind of what we're dealing with in our society right now.
Uh, we, we have this highly sensitive culture and we're highly
sensitive about a lot of things.
But we're not really digesting the inside of the story.
So this is causing a lot of, not only personal turmoils,
but social turmoils also.
Is that correct?
Yeah, I would say so.
Exactly.
When you don't digest your experiences, then you're left with this kind of
nasty feeling because you, you've got this lingering feeling of stress.
And as a society, we're all kind of doing that, right?
And maybe we have some big stressors to face, and that is challenging, right?
So in all fairness, it's not easy to digest these things.
But there is always a way to be peaceful in any situation.
You do have a choice whether you're super stressed out by something,
or you're just, you know, it got to me, but I kind of got through it,
I kind of see my way now and I'm actually a little clearer.
So it's a, it's a funny thing where it's easy to go into the victim
mentality where I feel like I can't, uh, can't control myself, I can't,
I can't control the environment, and therefore I am stuck and powerless.
Um, and what this does is when you start asking yourself what's going
on inside, what do you really see?
What do you really feel?
And is there another way of looking at this?
You start detaching from that.
You start seeing like, okay, there's some crazy stuff going on.
But it doesn't have to drag me down and when I'm not being dragged down, I'm
more empowered to help out in society.
So yeah, it works both ways.
Yeah, I, I find that interesting because I used to get worked up over, let's
say, Facebook posts and I would lash out because I wasn't really thinking deep
enough about, first off, where I was.
You're, you're on a social site that you don't know who you're dealing with.
All of these factors are dealing into what we are feeling about the situation.
So instead of really digesting that and thinking about my response,
I would just respond with those angers, those fears, those unknowns.
So how do we step out of that and into a more structured approach to identifying
what we want to approach and comment on, or just leave it alone altogether?
Yeah, it's a great question.
Um, really what we're talking about here is reaction.
We, what you described there, that anger when we see something injust
or we see something that just is wrong, we, the first reaction a lot
of times is anger or is some kind of other, uh, internal reaction.
And then we tend to just ride that, you know, we just express it and let it out.
And sure maybe that's good and better than keeping it in a certain way, but
in a way it's not really that effective.
Um, and you see that with social activists in life.
You'll see that, you know, the typical angry social activist that
is just so pissed off that you can't even hear the message 'cause
there's just so much anger going on.
And so that's an extreme version of it, but that gets
in our way of being effective.
If we wanna really be effective in making changes in the world, then we
have to take a step in between and work through the reaction part that happened.
And so what you described there is exactly what I would use as a beginning point.
So I see something on social media, it pisses me off, and then I'm like,
Okay, why is that pissing me off?
What is my thought?
What am I thinking and believing about this post or about this
person that is riling me up?
What is it?
And I want to get verbatim what those thoughts are.
I'll just type them onto a little, you know, a little note and see
if I can identify the thought that's connected to the emotion.
This is a really powerful step because we tend to think emotions just happen,
you know, just like a, like a, you know, earthquake just happens and
we don't have any, we don't have any control or understanding of it.
But emotions, although they do just happen, they always
are connected to some thought.
Thought, you know, mind and body are connected.
So the emotion is the body side of it, the mind side of it is whatever
thought you happen to be thinking.
If you look at any emotional situation, like when you're reacting,
you will find a, a, a thought or several thoughts connected to it.
And now you've got a handle on that emotion.
Now there's like an actual connecting there between that ephemeral emotional
experience and something we can work with.
And so once you have a statement in a specific situation, you
can systematically question it.
And that's what I learned from Byron Katie, is that there, she,
she gives four simple questions.
Is it true?
You know, really powerful right there.
You can spend quite a few minutes sitting in that.
And if that isn't enough, you ask again, Can you absolutely know it's true.
Just to see, you know?
And, and that just gets you thinking like, Okay, you know, this person,
let's say the thought was, let's think of like that social media situation,
This person, uh, you know, I don't know, we'd have to get into a specific, but it
would be like, This person doesn't care about so and so or whatever like that, you
know, it's some kind of um, or they just, they're just crazy or, yeah, I don't know.
And we would take the thought, whatever it is, the judgment that you have,
and then just, is that really true?
Are you sure?
And it starts opening your mind to, maybe there's another side to
that, or maybe there's something I'm missing, or it just slows you down a
little bit and already you can feel the emotions starting to come down.
Then you look, two other questions are, How do you react?
What happens when you believe this thought?
And you start seeing what actually happens.
It's like you're on drugs.
Like suddenly, you know, your heart starts pumping and you're, you're, you're
getting sweaty, and you're like, you wanna, you know, hurt the other person.
You're like, Where did these violent things come from?
And all kinds of reactions come out, you see images from the past, or it reminds
me of some other thing that happened.
This is all reaction.
So just seeing that gives you a little distance on what's going on.
And then one of my favorite questions is, Who would you be in that same
situation without the thought that, you know, whatever it is, They're
crazy or whatever it is that you, you're believing in that moment.
And it can blow your mind.
It can open your space, like your mind to a broader space where you're
now, you're now like, Wow, okay.
I'm seeing what they're doing more objectively and I'm actually seeing
how I could address that or just decide not to address, whatever's appropriate.
But the reaction isn't there, you know?
So this is like, there's several steps in this.
One is writing your stressful thoughts down, gives you a little distance
on 'em already, and then start questioning like this and it starts
giving you more and more perspective.
And then the final part is try turning the thought around and like seeing like where
there, there, maybe they're not crazy, or maybe they have some valid point,
or maybe, uh, maybe I've gotten crazy.
You know, like just start flipping it in different ways and seeing
if there's any truth in that.
And it can just, if you do it gently and, and connected with your heart
and with your experience, it can be very, very transformational.
So that's, to answer your question, how you can take the emotional reaction
out of it is like just slow it down.
That's really what this process is.
Yeah.
You know, and it sounds really simple now that I've figured it out and
you've obviously figured it out.
Sometimes when we're in those situations, before we start really considering
what we are doing in those situations, that's, that's really the trick because
nobody else is reacting but ourself.
So, and you've really got to understand that you control all of
those emotions and that reaction phase is, it's hard at times.
And my wife and I, we, we really go through this a lot because all of
the trauma that she went through.
We had to really get deep into those trauma issues for her to
recognize the trigger points.
And it, it was really hard until somebody started pointing it out,
Hey, look, you've got to look at this.
I can't tell you how to fix it, but I can tell you what I'm seeing.
So I, I really think that that's really a first part in healing, is
understanding ourself and what we despise, what makes us tick inside and out.
Yeah.
Well, a lot of times we judge ourselves for, for being triggered, or being
judgmental, or, you know, we can go into a loop on, on ourselves.
But giving yourself the space to be honest and just really be like, you
know, I just hate this and I just, and then, you know, letting that really be
heard or seen or in, in a, in like what I was describing before, writing it down.
Like just see, like, it's almost like there's a part inside of us that's
been complaining for a long time, and it's probably trauma related,
probably hurt by something in the past, it's been, it's sitting in there and
it's stuck and it needs to be heard.
It needs to be met with understanding, it needs to be held
a little bit, maybe listened to.
Um, and so if you can do that, you know, that alone is therapeutic.
Like, like they've done studies on that, just journaling and really getting it out
or talking to somebody, super therapeutic.
And so this just takes it one step further and be like, okay, so now is
that even true what you were thinking?
You know, sometimes it is, sometimes it isn't.
But it's amazing to, to explore that way.
Yeah.
Because it gives you choice, it gives you a feeling.
Yeah.
Sorry, go ahead.
I'm, I'm sorry.
Uh, so, so these work sessions, these inner work sessions that you
do on your podcast, very unique.
And this is what you are actually doing in these work sessions, is allowing
them to find out who they are instead of their thought of who they are.
Is that correct?
That's right.
That's exactly right.
We, we tend to identify with what we think we are and what we are thinking
and it's not actually necessarily true.
And what I love about it is it's open-ended.
It doesn't mean that if you question some thought that now you're just
gonna flip that around and now that's not, you know, it's just
gonna be kind of without thinking.
No, you're, we're exploring, we're doing like science on our own thoughts and
we're saying, you know, Let's take a look.
Let's just put all the cards on the table and see what adds up.
And maybe there's another explanation that is better, or maybe there's
just a more balanced way, or one that's less painful for me.
So yes, that's it.
We're just, we're just taking one situation at a time and looking
at what is contained in it.
And I can guarantee you your whole life is contained in one situation.
So you work some minute argument with the, your wife or something,
and it's like boom, the whole, the whole thing is in there.
So it can be very satisfying.
Um, you know, and I love it because it's like you're working in miniature.
Sometimes the most minute stressful situations can be the most powerful
to question because it's like working on a little miniature model
or something, and all the parts are there and you're working it, but,
uh, it's actually, it's like, Whoa.
That's the same big stuff that I have in, in other situations.
And so, yeah, it's very, very cool.
Yeah.
So when, when we do these work sessions with ourself, is it
good to do it with a partner?
You know, it's, I, there are two ways to do the work.
One is with a partner and one is by yourself and in writing.
I, I find that if you don't do it in writing, if you're doing it by yourself,
your mind just kind of starts, you know, it's hard to hold all of it
and it kind of, you end up kind of getting loose and, and distracted.
But, um, either way, with a partner or in writing, can be super powerful.
The advantage of doing it with a partner is that you feel heard by another human
being, which is also very helpful.
Uh, and they can hold you in answering the questions because the mind
will try to slip out of it and try to be like, well, you know, like
I'm just gonna go into why I think I'm still a victim.
You know, you just kind of miss the point.
So having someone there is really helpful.
That's, you know, that's the service I provide to my clients,
and you can do it with a friend, you can do it with, with anyone.
Um, and also, you know, when you're working with someone who's
done a lot of this work, you, they have a lot of experience.
So you may knock on a door of like, I'm kind of looking for, to see if a
turnaround might be true, for example, and you're like, I'm not finding anything.
But then you're sitting with someone who's also been down this
road and they're like, Well, yeah.
Have you tried this?
You know, try this and then look over here.
And it's not like telling someone what their answers are, but it's
saying have you looked over this side or have you checked over here?
And often you can find little hidden gems like that.
The advantage on the other hand of doing written work is you can do
it anytime by yourself, you don't have to tell anybody, you can throw
the thing out when you're done.
Uh, it's very private and, uh, it also allows you to do it slowly so you can
just take as much time as you want.
Some people, like I like to do things, uh, kind of methodically,
and so it has that advantage as well.
Well, and reflection.
You can always reflect back to your words because I, I really think that can, uh,
propel you to your next stage in life because you've seen how far you've come.
So I, I like to log it and make sure it's, I, I like podcasting, it's
one of those things that, it's a collaboration of individuals that have
suffered and overcame and it helps you progress a little here, little there.
And you, you can actually ultimately decide and pinpoint
the places you want to explore.
So it, it's a tailor made fit for everyone that way.
I, I really think that that's key.
It's, it's a form of expression.
I agree.
Yeah.
I, I love podcasting and I love, um, you know, the word you bring up, explore.
I think that's one of my favorite words.
I love exploring and that's what I think.
If you really embark on any kind of journey of inner work, it feels like
you're like, What am I gonna discover?
You know, there's so much unknown.
Like, what am I gonna learn about myself?
And, and that's fun.
I, I, I find that's, uh, that is as interesting to me as going out
and exploring the outer world, which of course is fun as well.
So yeah, exploring is, is where it's at, definitely.
Yep.
Yeah.
Uh, and that's one of our taglines is, educate yourself.
Lifelong learning, it's the key to everything.
And to do that, you gotta be a curious mind.
And it will, it will take you to places that you never would dream of.
So how do we get, uh, people to actually look inside beyond their feelings and
start bringing some of those issues to the forefront without a big fight?
Yeah.
Yeah, that's a great question.
So normally we are not gonna take the time when we're busy to do
something like some kind of inner work or some kind of questioning.
It seems like, yeah, I've got a lot going on.
I'm under the gun and there's a lot of, uh, just pressures to
just to stay balanced in life.
So, yeah.
Why I'm gonna add one more thing, like, you know, all those,
all that comes up for sure.
But what I find is that stress is what brings me to inner work.
Because when I get stressed enough, when something gets dire enough or
just becomes too much, um, then at that point, my openness, I start to be open.
I start to be receptive to taking some time, spending some time to go inward a
little bit, doing some, some harder work,
you know, taking a look at things, questioning what I'm believing.
That starts to be on the table when the stress level kind of amps up.
Um, and over time, I've been doing this work a long time
and I actually do it every day.
It's like become a habit of mine, but it doesn't have to be that way.
I, I know many clients that just come in waves, they'll be like, Yeah, you
know, I'm really needing some, some extra support 'cause I'm dealing with this.
And then, and then they'll go away for a while and then they'll
come back, and, and that's fine.
Um, what I find for myself is that when I'm doing it regularly,
it's like I'm peeling layers and layers off of my stress.
And I'm starting to catch it earlier and earlier and earlier.
And so for me, there's a kind of excitement that happens like, oh, okay.
What am I gonna learn from this one?
You know, oh, I just got triggered again.
It wasn't a hundred percent trigger, but it was still, it got me.
So what am I gonna learn?
Let's put it on the table, let's take a look.
And that curiosity starts to develop, uh, as you begin to trust yourself
and trust, uh, a process like this.
But I would say the motivator that gets people started is
just, you know, stress, pain.
Yeah.
You know, it was interesting, I watched one of your inner work
sessions with a gal. And, you know, it was like discovering your
true intention of your existence.
And that's when she realized, oh.
And then she could open up and identify more easily.
So sometimes those intentions that we fight, they're,
they're natural, are they not?
Yes, absolutely.
We're fighting, a lot of times, instinct and, you know, real strong desire
and, and these are natural things.
Um, there's, there's kind of different parts of us inside and
there's a part of us that, that wants what we want and that's, there's
nothing wrong with that, nothing.
We don't have to change that.
The only problem is when we, we're not able to get what we want
because of some, whatever reason.
And if we're still attached to getting what we want, that's
when the stress begins to amp up.
Otherwise, um, why not follow your heart's desire?
Why not do what inspires you?
Why not?
That is not the problem.
The problem is when life doesn't cooperate exactly the way, according to our
plan, and then we get, we get stressed.
So this work is for when that shows up and what it reveals is some attachment
there that has gotten like out of balance with the, with the reality.
Basically, it's like reality does its thing and we can be in sync
with it or out of sync with it.
And when we're outta sync with it, in other words, arguing with
reality, it's super stressful.
If we're in sync with it, like, okay, yeah, I want that, still want
that, but life's not cooperating with that right now, so I'm good.
Let me see what, how I can go with that and maybe down the line I'll be able to
still be working on, towards something.
But it's not like, I didn't get what I want, I'm a failure, or life is
not fair, or something like that.
So yeah, it's, it's, um, yeah, it's just being, as much as possible,
easygoing about our desires.
It's not that the desires are wrong.
I, I, like, take for example, the desire to make money or something, right?
Everybody has that, we need it.
It's, if you don't make money, you're, it's, uh, out of balance.
You're gonna end up, uh, you're gonna be starving if it comes to that.
Um, so there's nothing wrong with that.
It's how attached am I to it and how attached I am, am I to a
particular way I'm getting it or having to happen in a certain way.
Those are the things that can hang us up.
And when it doesn't happen the way we want, we can get super stressed
about it and a lot of survival instincts can come in and we can
start feeling really overwhelmed.
You question some of those thoughts, not to get rid of them, not to get rid
of the desire, but to find balance.
And this is a really key, uh, a key point, a key principle in the work that I do
is that these, these opposites that we play with are about balancing each other.
Like let's say it's that statement, I want money and you're questioning it.
I need more money, right?
You're questioning it.
It's like when you're thinking that, all the energy's on that
side and you're stressed about it 'cause you can't figure it out.
You're not getting there and, and all that.
You question it and you're like, Is it, is it true?
You know?
And who would I be without the thought that I need more money right now?
And, and, uh, and then you flip, flip it around and say,
Okay, I don't need more money.
How could that be also true?
And when you start finding examples of how not having more money right now would also
be fine, it starts balancing things out.
And that's the peace, that's where the peace is found.
It's not like you're just getting rid of the desire, you're just
balancing those two things.
So, so you're actually training your brain to fire less of one
chemical and more of the other.
And that, that can actually, it, it works.
And baby stepping that in, it, it does work.
Uh, addiction is a big one.
You know, what you're talking about there, you know, a lot of addicts can
relate with that because, well, they understand the disappointment and
then needing to recover from that.
So it's, it's interesting what our brain will do to us.
And if we're not aware that we can control that by just identifying what's, what
are we surrounding ourself with and what relationship do I have to this situation
and bringing that balance into our brain.
It's, it's very interesting to me and I love to study people.
Yeah, I'm, I'm with you.
Yes.
Um, but it, it means that we have more control than we think.
We tend to think that these, these reactions happen and we
don't know what to do about it.
But really there's, there's some steps in between, between that thing
happening to us and our reaction.
And that's a step of thinking.
And, and when I really look at that and really explore that, I have a lot of
control on whether that makes sense to me.
And, and I've, that's the cool thing about this work, uh, and why
I do it so much for myself, is that situations that used to trigger me
just don't even trigger me anymore because I now see how to sidestep that.
I'm like, you know, No big deal.
Okay, you're criticizing me.
That's a tough one but the more I do the work on it, I'm like, Oh, you're giving me
some feedback and it has, if there's any charge on it from your side, that's you.
It's not really even me.
And I'm sort of like, Okay, I'm fine.
You know, like you can actually, I remember it's like feeling like a bullet
went past me and I just dodged it and it went, uh, went and hit the wall somewhere.
So that's what happens as you bring in awareness, and this
is just one way of doing that.
Well, now you're also balancing your IQ with EQ at the same time.
Because if, if you're bringing up the emotional equation there, then the
intellectual equation comes up also.
So we're dealing with two parts of the brain and everything that we do
takes that balance that we talk about.
So we're dealing with a world full of sensitivity and a lot of people don't
know how to tap into help and ask for help because of that being sensitive.
How can we help those people understand it's okay to reach out and ask for help.
Yeah, it takes, it takes courage, it takes humility, uh, to be able to do that.
And, you know, I don't have a quick fix for that, but I think
one of the things that helped me is knowing that I'm not alone.
You know, that, that we all go through different emotional
challenges and are affected by things.
This is not, uh, something that's just happening to you.
And I, I think in our society for so many decades or maybe
centuries, it's been put aside.
Like mental health just put to the side, emotions put to the side, and it's,
there's a little taboo around that.
So, luckily that seems to be changing.
Um, but it still takes courage.
And so I just encourage anyone to, to explore any resources, whether they're
books, or podcasts, or anywhere where people are starting to do their work
and starting to share, um, with others.
And there are many groups as well, you know?
And just where you can begin to see that you're not alone.
Even twelve step programs are amazing, uh, where you can see, be with other people
that are sharing the same struggles.
If you can be in a community with other people, it starts to normalize your,
uh, what you think is an experience that is, you need to get rid of.
It's probably not need to get rid of, you just need to get listened to
and then dealt with in a way that, uh, can, can be more balancing.
You know, it's interesting.
A good way to handle that is, there's a bunch of like Facebook
groups that deal with these topics.
And even if you're at the point, you're not ready to open up, just joining
the group and be a fly on the wall and witnessing how many people are
dealing with these different things, it, it really can help you open up
and develop a way to express yourself.
Because I really think that's the key.
If, if we can't express ourselves, we're bottled up and we feel
left out, alone, isolated.
Yeah.
Yeah, like there, we think that because we're experiencing something
negative, then there's something wrong with us so we should hide it
and try to work it out on our own.
And then when we're feeling good, then maybe we'll come back
out and be in the world again.
But, you know, you're not alone.
If you're dealing with negativity, welcome to the world.
That's what all human beings deal with.
And so, you know, like just seeing that is okay.
Uh, and, and I love how you said balancing IQ with EQ because there's a certain,
a lot of us, I think the EQ is like a little bit immature in some ways or a
little bit, I don't know if immature is the right word, but stuck sometimes
because it's not seeing the light of day.
It's getting squashed and overridden by so much IQ and so much, so much of that side.
So giving that, it's almost like talking to a little baby or something and saying,
Hey, let's, let's hear what you think.
Let's hear your thoughts.
And it's gonna go, Ahh, you know, and it's gonna start being, uh, if
you really allow it, it's gonna cry.
It's gonna, it's gonna rant, it's gonna, it's, it's gonna sound like pure ego.
Fantastic, that is wonderful.
Like, welcome that in.
Because this is the part that's been squelched for so long.
It's not that it's, that it should be hidden away, it should be listened to
and then questioned a little bit because it's, it's got something true going on.
But it's, it might have, the idea might be on the wrong, you know,
but it just might be, need a little adjustment as it comes out.
Yeah, that, that's the illustration I was looking for right there because, you
know, there's a lot of intelligent people out there that lack some EQ and really
just putting them on the spot is never going to help it.
It, it's, it's a balance thing that we have to figure out and hopefully the
world keeps shoving this positivity out instead of the negativity.
And I've, I've been seeing a lot of people do that, uh, turn
theirselves and their attention to positivity instead of negativity.
And that's when we can move mountains with whatever we do.
So is there anything, Todd, that we haven't covered that we
need to cover for your episode?
Well, just, um, building on what you were saying there, I think is an, an important
point is that, um, two things, one is that, that with a process like this, you
can transform negativity into positivity.
And so you can transform, not the situation, that you don't necessarily,
you can't always change, but you can change your view of it from something
negative to something positive.
And then allowing, like even if you do have something negative, if you
have a way of listening to that, being honest about it, and then challenging
yourself on it, you can end up, uh, in a different place about it.
And then what you thought was negative is not so, is not really negative.
It doesn't feel negative, even though everyone would agree that
it's, you know, not so positive.
So it's all about how you see things.
Uh, I think that's the first thing I wanted to say.
Um, and then the other is, I think the key is feeling safe.
Uh, if you don't feel safe to do, to look at something, uh, negative or something in
yourself, some reaction, if you don't feel safe, then you're just gonna block it.
You'll be like, You know what?
I, I don't need this.
And what, what I find, why I love this particular process is that
it's like saying, You know what?
You've been waiting, you, Mr. Ego or Mr. Pushed down emotions, you've been
waiting for a long time to be heard and I've been putting you off, and I
just want to hear what you have to say.
You know, and we don't even have to turn all this around.
Let's just, I just want to hear what you have to say and I wanna listen.
And that starts to say, okay, you know what?
I feel a little safer, I'll, I'll share a little bit.
And then if we do the process, like questioning and turning around,
then I'm, I'm almost telling the little stuck part inside of me, I
want you to answer the questions.
I want you to be in control of this process and I want you to be able to
say, you know, no, that isn't really, uh, true, you know, for me anyway.
Or I, I want you to be the one going through this process.
And for me, just on a, just on a feeling level, it feels like,
okay, I am allowed to be what I am.
Which is not amazing and looking good in the world.
I'm allowed to be where I am on an internal level, and I'm gonna be met
with understanding, and I'm gonna be able to work through it if I want to.
And I'm also able to say, Shut the door, and I need a break from this too.
So safety, I think, is really important when you're ever
doing, uh, this kind of work.
Yeah.
Well, you're, you're doing a lot of great work out there and people need
that safe space to present themselves.
So could you tell people some of the services that you do offer and how
they can actually reach out to you?
Sure.
Yeah.
So, um, you can reach out to me @trueinnerfreedom.com and, uh, I have
a, a podcast at, uh, which is Stress Management for Highly Sensitive People.
And, um, you know, I offer an online course and I offer private sessions,
and those are the two main ways that I support people, uh, in doing this process.
Really, that's, that's what I do.
And I, I, people often ask me, Do you get tired of, like,
dealing with people's negativity?
And I'm like, No, it's actually, feels amazing because I'm watching it fall away.
I'm watching the, the, um, you know, the stress get uncoiled and unraveled
in a way and it's, it's, it's very fun.
So yeah, if you wanna learn more about me, come on over to trueinnerfreedom.com.
And, and that's what you do, you're a facilitator to just keep, keep
the session on track where it's achieving some inner work instead of
floating off to Never- Never Land.
And that spin that we do to avoid ourself, it's important to have somebody there and
say, Okay, let's bring it back to center.
So I, I really appreciate what you're doing out there, Todd.
I appreciate you being here today and sharing what you do and some
of your great ideas with us.
Thank you for having me.
It's just been a pleasure talking with you and I've enjoyed every
minute of the conversation.
So thanks a lot.
I spent my whole life feeding every little thing.
The world came rushing at me like a flood.
Folks said I was too tender, told me to grow thick skin.
But I was drowning trying to be what I wasn't.
And somebody showed me there's no shame in stepping back
and knowing when to rest ain't running away.
My heart beats different, always has, and that's all right.
There's power in the quiet strength in needing space.
I'm finding sacred ground where I can breathe again.
Learning how to honor what I need.
The questions lead me closer than the answers ever did.
I'm claiming back the soul they said was weak.
Through the gentle way, I'm finally free.
The morning light don't have to burn to prove it's real.
The voice don't have to shout to speak the truth.
I'm done apologizing for the depth I carry here.
My tender heart's the strongest part of me.
I'm finding sacred ground where I can breathe again.
Learning how to honor what I need.
Questions lead me closer than the answers ever did.
I'm claiming back the soul they said was weak.
Through the gentle way, I'm finally free.
What overwhelms can turn to grace, when I stop fighting who I am
ever since this soul deserves a place.
Stand and say, This is where I belong.
I'm finding sacred ground where I can breathe again.
Learning how to honor what I need.
Questions lead me closer than the answers ever did.
I'm claiming back the soul they said was weak.
Through the
gentle
way, I'm finally free.
Through the gentle way,
I found my peace.